What do I need to know to understand the other gender?

Sally:

Where do I even start? Boys and girls are so different. I’ve had a boyfriend, many guy friends, and an older brother, so I would like to claim that I understand the male gender. Here are some things to keep in mind. Disclaimer – these are just generalizations and in no way are applicable to all boys or girls.

First, don’t expect them to know what you’re thinking – Girls often want something, but don’t tell boys that they want it. As a repercussion, the girls get angry that the boys don’t get the thing they wanted. Don’t expect a boy to be able to read your mind – if you want something but aren’t telling them that you want it, it is your fault if they don’t change. You need to tell them what you’re thinking in order for them to know.

Relax. I don’t mean to play into a stereotype, but through my experience I have seen that boys are often more laid back than girls. To be most compatible with guys, just relax. Don’t be too overbearing or overwhelming, just be easy going. Boys’ emotional development is a few years behind girls’, so keep in mind that they aren’t quite up to speed with how fast and intense your emotions are.

Next, what you think is wrong, he might not think is wrong. He probably doesn’t see the big deal in not responding to your text immediately, or not saying bye to you when he leaves school. Don’t take it as a personal attack that he is rude or disinterested, just understand that he probably doesn’t see it as that big of a deal.

Lastly, they are not big on drama. As proof, boy friend groups usually have less drama than girl groups do. Don’t feel unappreciated or upset if he tries to quickly end fights – he’s probably just not used to the drama because he doesn’t deal with it a lot.

If you don’t understand something else about boys, just ask. They have emotions just like you, and they want to get along with girls as best as they can.

Sincerely,
Sally

Steve:

I am not, and do not claim to be, well versed in the ways of women. Women, to most men, are an enigma, myself included. And therefore, just like any online relationship advice columnist, I am perfectly qualified to give advice! So here are a few of the things that you need to know about women.

First, women are more mature than men, it’s that simple. They don’t find our crass jokes funny, and they don’t necessarily appreciate the school yard ribbing that all boys engage in on the quad. Hanging out with the boys is a whole different ball game than hanging out with your significant other, and sometimes it’s hard to make that switch. So, men, when you are with your ladies, remember, class not crass!

Women also really like the little things that make a relationship, i.e opening doors, saying goodbye at the end of a conversation, offering to pay, and things of that nature. These things are hard to remember sometimes, but following through and acting like a true gentleman is a sure fire way to any woman’s heart (I got that one from Cosmo so you know it’s reliable).

Also, women appreciate basic courteousness, instead of rambling on about this wet three you sunk at the buzzer, or how you can deadlift a small bison, ask her about her day. In sum, show her that you care about her, and are capable of not solely thinking about yourself for extended periods of time. So there you have it, a few tips about thoughtfully engaging with women, they aren’t that scary after all!

Sincerely,
Steve